“Huh? What are you talking about? Why should I kiss dating goodbye? Are you nuts? Shouldn’t this be the age when we go out for as many dates as possible and as often as we like to see who we are compatible with? You are a fool, Ern Sheong, for trying to tell me to stop dating. It would never happen.”

I recently read a thought-changing and mind-renewing book by Joshua Harris entitled “I Kissed Dating Goodbye.” It encourages us to look beyond dating for the fulfillment of the moment and instead exhorts that we withhold the desire to date until the day we are ready for a long-term commitment. A sentence from the book sums up the entire message: ‘The joy of intimacy is the reward of commitment.’

“Why?” you ask. Simply because being with someone now without consideration of commitment is actually a very selfish act as we only gratify ourselves and not the needs of the other person as well. When commitment is not in the equation, the relationship is only waiting for the end to come as there is no lasting commitment.

Another point is that God already has better plans in store for us. He wants us to focus on Him first and not be distracted by dating. He wants us to serve Him whole-heartedly first instead of dwelling on thoughts of whether this girl or guy likes us or not. When the right time comes, God will reveal someone to us, once we are ready for commitment.

That is just a gist of what the book is trying to tell us. I encourage you (unless you are already married) to pick up a copy of this book today at major Christian bookstores. If you were wondering, the writer of this book did indeed get married to his dream sweetheart. That is living proof that you will not be left as a single for the rest of your lives despite reading this book!

I find that many times I do not bring the things that bother me to the Lord in prayer. I always forget that prayer is the way to connect to God, instantly and intimately.

Today, I sang this song “What a Friend We Have In Jesus” in church and I just teared as I was touched by God’s presence. I had always been carrying my burden “like a little boy carrying a big sack” (quoted from the prophecy spoken to me) and I had always forgot to let God carry the burden for me (through prayer) so that I can travel light and run faster.

Today, I let go of the baggage of fear, disappointment, anxiety/worry and all the things that hinder me:

Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us (Hebrews 12:1, NASB)

How? Make Jesus your friend and take it to the Lord in prayer (lyrics shown below):

What a friend we have in Jesus,
all our sins and griefs to bear!

What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer!

O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,

All because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?

We should never be discouraged;
take it to the Lord in prayer.

Can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share?

Jesus knows our every weakness;
take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden,
cumbered with a load of care?

Precious Savior, still our refuge;
take it to the Lord in prayer.

Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!

In his arms he’ll take and shield thee;
thou wilt find a solace there.

(Words: Joseph Scriven, 1855. Music: Charles Converse, 1868.)

A forwarded story that I would like to share:

Attitude is Everything

An old man lived alone in Minnesota. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work.

His only son, who would have helped him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation:

Dear Son,

I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my potato garden this year. Your mother always loved planting time, but I’m afraid I would have to disappoint her this time. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over.I know you would dig the plot for me if you weren’t in the prison.

Love,
Dad

Shortly, the old man received this telegram:

“For Heaven’s sake, Dad, don’t dig up the garden!! That’s where I buried the GUNS!!”

At 4 a.m.the next morning, a dozen FBI agents and local police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden without finding any guns.

Confused, the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened and asked him what to do next.

His son’s reply was:

“Go ahead and plant your potatoes, Dad. It’s the best I could do for you from here.”

NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE IN THE WORLD, IF YOU HAVE DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING DEEP IN YOUR HEART, YOU CAN DO IT. IT IS THE THOUGHT THAT MATTERS, NOT WHERE YOU ARE.

If you feel down or dejected today, do watch this video and listen to the spirited acoustic instrumental. Really awesome.

I play the guitar, but his level of playing is seriously very very good.

Introducing Andy Mckee, playing Africa! Enjoy!

I would like to share what my pastor touched on last Sunday in City Harvest KL.

The Law of Navigation from John Maxwell (From the book 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, which I read many years ago)

To sum it use, we refer to the acrostic PLAN AHEAD.

PREDETERMINE a course of action.
LAY OUT your goals.
ADJUST your priorities.
NOTIFY key personnel.

ALLOW time for acceptance.
HEAD into action.
EXPECT problems.
ALWAYS point to the successes.
DAILY review your plan.

To remember, guys can just do this train of thought. (no no my pastor didn’t go through all this although he did touch on it =))

PREDETERMINE the girl you want to ask out for a date.
LAY OUT your plan for the date. (movie? candlelight dinner? buy her a bouquet of flowers? do you have enough cash?)
ADJUST your schedule and make sure that it fits hers, not yours! What do you expect out of the date? Prioritize.
NOTIFY her (duh!), your parents (if they are cool about it), and perhaps the restaurant.

ALLOW some time for her to get to know you and accept the invitation. DON’T RUSH IT. Haste makes waste.
HEAD to the appointed venue, or pick her up from her home if you can drive.
EXPECT problems! Yes, she may not be able to accept you so quickly. She might reject you outright. She might not like you anyway, etc
ALWAYS point to how beautiful she is on the inside and outside. How you enjoy spending time with her, etc.
DAILY think about her. And pray about it.

Haha.

Let it be said here concisely: (some of it)

• There are no limitations to the mind except those that we acknowledge.
• No one has ever been defeated until defeat has been accepted as a reality.

We may think that some people are lucky to get “breaks and opportunities” that plunge them to great success, but in reality, it is the persistence and the strong desire to see a dream come true that causes thought to be turned into reality. They acted upon their thoughts and did not procrastinate until the thought has been transformed into its physical equivalent.

Let me share with you a poem from the book:

“If you think you are beaten, you are,
If you think you dare not, you don’t.
If you like to win, but think you can’t,
It is almost certain you won’t.

If you think you’ll lose, you’re lost,
For out in the world we find,
Success begins with a fellow’s will -
It’s all in the state of mind.

If you think you are outclassed, you are,
You’ve got to think high to rise,
You’ve got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win the prize.

Life’s battles don’t always go
To the stronger or faster man,
But soon of late the one who wins
Is the man WHO THINKS HE CAN!”

I can’t say it any better than the poet. The challenge for the individual is to apply it and always walk in the positive. Without a doubt, he/she will be among the greats who ever walked this earth.