A prayer request
I apologize.
I really need to let go and let nothing hold me back, but I struggle to do so. It is not easy, as you may know, and sometimes I just wonder what is going on in the other side as well. I feel utterly foolish.
I want to let go but it’s hard and there’s something holding me back. I guess only God can remove all barriers and burdens and carry them for me. Oh God, hold this burden for me for a while will You, I want to be free for the next 4-5 years to learn, see and explore the world.
I don’t know why I am not that gung-ho about leaving the country for Berkeley, even though everyone else seems to have gone crazy in their excitement of their impending university life. I feel a tinge of sadness, leaving home and leaving the people I know.
I need that excitement and my boundless energy back. I want to be free from any burdens.
I worry too much about the future and neglect to live life to the fullest in the moment, thinking about many things which I cannot control. I forgot to live in the moment and not worry too much about what may happen in the days to come.
Yeah, someone pray for me.
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=) Prayed. Don’t worry la. Everything will go according to God’s plans for you!
thanks!
You are in my prayers, Ern Sheong. Sorry for getting back to you late. Things have been a little hectic, and I need a good amount of time to give you the response your post deserves.
It is normal to feel not so excited about going to US. You have, after all, studied overseas and this time round, it’s just that it’s US. It might be a good sign, that you are handling pressures well.
If you are feeling burdened or heavy, ask God to lift it from you. I doubt that God will make you get unsettled about going to US, because that will mean that this is not what God has in plan for you, and well, since He has brought you this far, I don’t see what else God can have in mind for you. Hence, the worry is more likely not from God… then it has to be from you… or the enemy. Either way, pray that it may lifted. =) I had a day where suddenly, after my daily Bible study, I felt so heavy, sad and burdened that I felt my energy sapped and thought I wouldn’t last a day outside… I felt like going to bed and ly there the whole day, then I cried out to God, and He lifted the burden from me.
As Jesus said, worrying doesn’t add a day to your life. Go read Matthew 25-34 out loud. Good therapy. I read John 14 when I am sad, to keep Heaven in perspective, hehe.
God bless, and His protection and peace, the peace that transcends all understanding, be over you!
@Ome: I really cannot express enough gratitude to you for responding to my posts in such length for so long a time already. Thanks for everything bro.
Yeah indeed I have been praying a lot, personally and also corporately in church, and this week my church happened to have daily prayer meeting from 7-8 am so I have been going on and off. I think that what my cell group leader told me today in a sermon makes sense. Why let the joy be stolen from me. Why not be joyful and why worry so much. Why expect less from God and not trust in Him whole-heartedly. Why lose that faith in Him. It’s going to be a very challenging few years and I am going to take this opportunity to mature and grow as well.
I think it took many prayers to feel a difference in my own self. But yeah I did feel something lifted. I think idleness can sometimes be harmful. That’s why it is good that man is occupied with things which he can do with all his heart. And with that also, guys like me can put relationship-related matters in the back burner until God says that it is the right season.
Cheers. God bless you too. All the best in preparation for studies in NUS.
Don’t despair, yeah. I’ve been there myself, and though I’m still a work in progress, I can assure you that God will make things better. =)
Yeah, I’m sorta not that excited either to leave Malaysia. Sorta.
@alethea: sorta huh
yeah I guess we all have mixed feelings when it comes to leaving home. we are leaving something behind, but at the same time we are gaining something in front of us. life’s like that I guess.